Invinciblog Exclusive! Adams Interview…
On May 11, 2001, Arsenal lost the FA Cup Final to Liverpool. 2-1, in Cardiff.
On the same day, in Santa Barbara, California, beloved author and Arsenal supporter Douglas Adams’ world did end. He died suddenly of a heart attack at the tender age of 49.
Let’s just say it was a bad day for Gooners and leave it at that.
The following is an imaginary interview with Douglas Adams. (DA) – conducted by yours truly: Batmandela (BM). Mr. Adams’ replies are culled, verbatim, from his numerous books, letters and scripts. It is an interview I would have loved to have conducted during Douglas Adams’ lifetime. But things don’t always work out the way we planned.
I have a feeling, though, that he’d have found this concept mildly amusing…
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Ladies and Gentlemen. Um… Gentlemen.
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Lord Atticus Barton-Shawcross. I am a retired SAS Colonel. I spent 23 years working in Covert Operations, until changes in modern warfare, introduced by chicken-shit – excuse my French – civilian commanders, severely curtailed our ability to operate in the effective manner to which we were accustomed.
The 'new rules' of combat essentially emasculated us, by introducing restrictive procedural guidelines, punitive post-operation review, and political oversight. Basically – we had our nuts removed, and replaced with estrogen-infused, non-toxic, hypo-allergenic potpourri pouches.
Killing people just wasn't fun any more. Which is why I left.
I started my own 'Private Security and Logistics' company. I sold toilet paper to the Armed Forces for $5.00 a roll. And then charged them $5.00 to remove the cardboard tubes when the paper was finished. Stuff like that. And I used the millions of dollars I made to create my own army. And get things done the old way, if you catch my drift.
In short – I found a way to do what I loved, however the frick I wanted, and get paid a lot of money doing it.
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