Tag: Trophies

Fools Rule: On Shlemmings.

Posted on February 28th, by batmandela in Fools Rule. 3 comments

This is not a blog about ticket price hikes and how they reflect the insensitivity of a profitable institution towards its loyal fanbase.

It’s not about how Arséne Wenger’s apparent tightfistedness and shortsightedness may lead to his undoing. I also don’t want to discuss the rumour that he has a contract ready-signed, and that the club is just waiting for an opportune moment to ram it down our throats – a Sagna/Rosicky contract renewal announcement, for instance.

I’m not interested in writing about how ironic it is that our star signing initiated the collapse of our Champions League campaign with his second consecutive (lackadaisical) CL PK miss.

And – while I’m not at it – I’m also not convinced that Arsenal can repeat last season’s performance in the upcoming return fixture at the Allianz Arena. As Heraclitus said, “A man cannot cross the same river twice.” Besides – as fantastic as last year’s heroic failure might have been, Bayern Munich did appear to be resting on their laurels somewhat. (At least until the second goal.) I doubt that they’ll make the same mistake twice.

So I’m certainly not wasting my time writing about that!

The latest rumours about Morata having already signed a … Read More »


2013 – The Year Of The Gun [RSS]

Posted on January 2nd, by batmandela in Barclays Premier League, General, Opinion, Tarot, The Club, The Squad. No Comments

Invinciblog takes an in-depth look at the challenges facing Arsenal.

2013 – Year Of The Gun

Posted on January 2nd, by batmandela in General, Opinion, Tarot. 5 comments

Invinciblog takes an in-depth look at the challenges facing Arsenal.

Fool Metal Jacket

Posted on November 16th, by batmandela in Fools Rule, General, Opinion, The Anger Games. No Comments

Pitchfork and torch sales are up. So are black scarf sales. And apparently Cleaver & Gush – (Purveyors of Fine Guillotines – By Appointment To Her Majesty The Queen) have had an inordinate number of hits on their website. Which can only mean one thing:

Yup. Some fans may be content to just sit back and watch their Arsenal slide into obscurity. Others are revolting.

You can catch the latter at any given moment: indiscriminately flaming other online Gooners. Hysterically tweeching:

“We want our Arsenal back! #WengerOut”

“Y r hapy with decade of no troaphy Arsenal? UR n idiot. Same like Wenger. #WengerOut”

“Wenger is runing our club. We need Guadoila hell fix it Barcilona always win silverwere. #PepIn #WengerOut”

Temperatures are rising. Fingers are being pointed. Matches are being boycotted. Marches are being planned. The team is being booed. (And all the while, the media gleefully amplifies the noise – not the signal – perhaps because it fits in better with their let’s-criticize-Arsenal-at-every-opportunity agenda?)

Possibly inspired by the Arab Spring, or the Occupy Movement – angry Arsenal fans are saying ‘enough is enough’ and clamouring for heads to roll… starting with the head of our once-revered Manager, Arséne Wenger. And ostensibly followed by those … Read More »

Wenger Diaries (Part 1): A Golden Goat

Posted on October 2nd, by batmandela in General, Wenger Diaries. No Comments

Exclusive! Excerpts from Arséne Wenger’s personal diaries*… Le Prof, as you’ve never seen him before: Raw and exposed.

(*Not really)

The Convincibles – Why this season is make-or-break for Arsenal

Posted on September 15th, by batmandela in Barclays Premier League, Opinion, The Squad. 7 comments

Every season is make-or-break for Arsenal.

At least that's what you'd think if you paid any attention to any of the millions of things that delivered opinion to the 21st Century Gooner: Boobtube, Arsetube, Twit-tube, Intertube… Hell – I reckon there are even carrier pigeons out there with “MAKE-OR-BREAK SEASON FOR ARSENAL!” scrolls attached to their scaly little sky-rat diabys.

At the beginning of each new season, there is a collective urge – after patting ourselves on the back for last season's Bronze medal – to pile pressure on the Manager, and whatever players remain at the club. The dizzying height of our recent (who'm I kidding!) glory days was as addictive as that blue meth in “Breaking Bad” – we liked being at the top of the food chain. It suited our self-image, and gave us the right to puff up and gloat and insult all those other scumbag clubs out there.

But The Seven Year Itch is upon us. And after losing our Captain and key players for two years on the trot, there is a sense that one more year of settling for Champions League qualification just won't crack it. Arsene Wenger himself, while squashing rumours of a … Read More »

Wishful Sinking: Why We Should forget van Whatsisname.

Posted on September 12th, by batmandela in General, Opinion. 1 Comment

Us Gunners are a passionate bunch. No doubt about it. And competitive rivalry between clubs is an essential part of being a supporter. But, in the same way that we run the club with solid principles, and play the game with a sense of style, so should we, I believe, conduct ourselves in an appropriate manner.

The Sting In The Tale

Posted on September 11th, by batmandela in Barclays Premier League, General, Opinion. 2 comments

The Arsenal fairy tale du jour is that Ian Wright, Thierry Henry, Dennis Bergkamp AND Robin van Persie all opened their Arsenal league goal-scoring accounts against Southampton…

THE TOWER

Posted on August 20th, by batmandela in General, Opinion, Tarot. 2 comments

“Misery, distress, indigence, adversity, calamity, disgrace, deception, ruin.
It is a card in particular of unforeseen catastrophe.”

Hmmm. Maybe I need to find a more optimistic Tarot deck. It’s behaving rather like a black-bag-Gooner at present… The urge to ‘cheat’ and draw another card was almost irresistible, but I guess there is an Arsenal-appropriate lesson to be learned by accepting the hand I’ve been dealt, and making the most of it.

“Misery, disgrace, deception”

Do I wish that our traitorous captain hadn’t issued his foolish and ill-advised Independence Day statement? Yup. Do I regret that he backed his Manager, his Club, into a corner – forcing them to sell him to the only club that showed interest? Yes, sirree. And most of all: do I regret that that club was our sworn enemy? Of course I do.

I would have loved to have seen him be true to his many words, and only win trophies with his beloved childhood club. For a gray-haired, glass-ankled donkey, he sure had a great last season – “dragging us over the finish line” (with a little help from his friends…) But the donkey has joined the Dark Side and gone off to join Shrek at you-know-where. Too … Read More »